There Was a Time

There was a time before Twitter, hash tags and snap chat. There was a time before a college girl would walk up to my barista station while face timing and talking loudly on her phone right in the middle of trying to order, as she acted as though I was interrupting her. As I patiently waited through her going back to her conversation, back and forth, as I waited to take her order and serve her.

There was a time before every college student had his or her phone out, scrolling through it, eyes down, as s/he walked through campus. There was a time before everyone had ear buds in, and now wireless ear buds sticking out of their ears.

There was a time before I secretly cringed as a student walked up to me, and I prayed he wouldn't order the frappuccino with all the syrups and sugars, while also ordering a chocolate chunk muffin to be washed down by it into his belly. I prayed he wouldn't try to give himself diabetes. But he ordered it anyway, over and over again.

Long ago, there was a time my parents held me in their arms when I was a tiny baby. I don't remember this, but I know they did. When I can't sleep, I like to imagine this. I see my father with his blue eyes and dark, neatly combed hair, cradling me in his arms as he held me, folding me in with all his love, protecting me. My father died too young, but bravely, doing what he loved. It broke my heart. It was a time in my life when I lived far away from him, overwhelmed with caring for my three young children, one of them quite disabled. Things are better now, but I was quite home bound and exhausted at that time. I wasn't able to immediately fly out to see him at the end. My father was my hero, and that loss changed me in profound ways.

I also imagine and remember my patient mother holding me, the warmth of her lap and arms comforting me as she rocked me. She with her strong faith, her quietness, her groundedness, I looking up at her face as she looked out, calmly. Always there for me, always thinking of the rest of us, intelligently keeping us safe and well, partly with the good medical advice she had gleaned from doctor visits and a lifetime of experience. She didn't feel the need to run around with flocks of women - she did have good friends, though, and loved quietly reading at home, reading classics, fiction, and the bible, providing the love in our nest.

There was a time before skateboarders rode their boards and hover boards clandestinely but openly down the school hallways, as if they were better than the rest of us and didn't have to follow the rules. There was a time when the family came home to eat dinner together. A time when everything we didn't eat wasn't thrown in dumpsters and landfills.

I remember a time before giant storms wrecked the Bahamas, Florida, the Carolinas, the Texas coasts, and then turned around and hammered it all again. Before offshore oil rigs exploded and leaked toxic fossil products into the ocean for weeks. A time when our oceans and beaches were not chock-full of plastics and other garbage.

There was a time before giant wildfires raged in California, in Canada, in the Amazon rain forests, in Alaska and Siberia. Before person after person wielded firearms and with one squeeze of a little trigger cut down dozens of people in schools, shopping malls and movie theaters. There was a time before people hijacked airplanes and committed suicide and homicide by flying the planes into giant skyscrapers, causing the buildings to crumple as if they were card houses, killing thousands.

There used to be many more than just two northern white rhinos left in the wild. Will the subspecies be able to survive from the embryos scientists created through IVF? I think it's doubtful.

There was a time before people injected their faces with Botox and fillers, before we were fascinated with "Housewives" and Kardashian/Jenners rather than our own friends and neighbors. Before we felt panicked when we were without our phone chargers and fitness trackers and GPS devices to find our way.

Today is Friday the 13th. It feels like Friday the 13th. It feels like the Groundhog Day Friday the 13th of history. The foreboding of a downfall. The signs are clear. We are warned. The warnings are screaming at us. Are we listening? But -- there is always hope. Humans can be great, they can be astonishing, and they can be terrible. We have free will. We have choice. Are we going to be great, or are we going to be terrible? Let us choose, boldly choose, to be great. Let us have hope. Now and forevermore, amen.

Melissa Etheridge Showed the Crowd at the Clyde How to Get Her Done

I think of Bruce Springsteen when I hear Melissa Etheridge. She's an original rocker who can belt it out, and charm the crowd with her swagger. She owns the room. Her emotion, her passion, her presence - she is so great, what a privilege to see her up close and in person.

The Clyde Theatre, a renovated movie theatre on Bluffton Road in Fort Wayne, is an exciting newer venue in the area. On the south side of downtown and right by Foster Park, an architect named A. M. Strauss drew plans for Quimby Village and the Clyde Theatre in 1949. The 1780-seat theatre drew people from the Indiana-Ohio regions when it opened in 1951.

Chuck and Lisa Surack from Sweetwater industries, along with other area partners, renovated the venue beginning in 2017, classily preserving most of the original Art Deco design of the spaces. There's a second-floor VIP gallery, a 7000 square foot artists dressing room and hospitality wing, and space for weddings and other public bookings for events.

Melissa's songs "I'm the Only One" and "Come to my Window" had the crowd on their feet and belting out every word. Melissa has a big backing by the LGBTQ+ community, but her fan base is bigger than that - there were people of all ages, straight or gay, in attendance. Her appeal is mainstream as well as off stream, broad with a wide audience.

Born in 1961, Melissa released her first album in 1988, and the single "Bring me Some Water" from it earned her a Grammy nomination for Best Female Rock Vocal Performance. In 1993, she won her first Grammy for the song "Ain't it Heavy." She received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in 2011. For years she has been a noted advocate for LGBTQ+ rights.

In October 2004, Etheridge was diagnosed with breast cancer, and underwent surgery and chemotherapy. Bald from chemo, Melissa came out for the 2005 Grammy's and performed Janis Joplin's "Piece of my Heart" as a tribute. This performance has since been considered iconic, and has been highly lauded, commented and tweeted about.

Her current tour, entitled The Medicine Show, supports the release of her 15th studio record of the same name. She's crossing the country to play in cities such as New York, Bonita Springs, New Orleans, Des Moines, and Chandler, AZ.

The Clyde has two onsite bars for concert patrons - one inside the concert hall so you don't miss a note, and one in the lobby, where you can have a conversation and take a breather if need be. It's just the right size - very fan friendly. I have had friends raving about seeing great traveling acts there, and I finally made it to see for myself. We are so fortunate to have such great music spots in the Fort! I can't wait to go back! Peace and love to you all. See you at Sweetwater, at the Embassy, at the Foellinger, at Memorial Coliseum, at the Clyde - or maybe, just see you at the movies.

Pokagon State Park and the Potawatomi Inn are an Hour's Drive from the Fort

Pokagon State Park in Steuben County is a real jewel. Sitting on the shores of Lake James and near Angola and Fremont, Indiana, the park and lodge have lots to offer.

Citizens of the county raised funds in 1925 to buy 580 acres of land and then donated it to the state of Indiana. More land was purchased or donated over the years, and now the park includes 1260 acres of trails, woods, and beaches. The Civilian Conservation Corps built the lodge and other structures beginning in 1927.

There's so much in this park. Camping facilities, a staff of full-time naturalists, paved bicycle trails, hiking trails, a nature interpretive center, playgrounds, a swimming beach, a marina with boat rentals, cabins, meeting and conference facilities, a camping general store, a saddle barn, and the fabulous toboggan run. Part of the toboggan run is pictured above.

The refrigerated toboggan run hosts about 90,000 riders every winter season. There is a vertical drop of 90 feet over a quarter mile. Sled speed can reach 40 miles per hour for a 20-30 second total ride. Operation hours are usually November 29 through March 1. Sled rentals are $13/hour and the park entrance fee is $7 for in-state vehicles.

We recently went to stay at the Potowatami Inn. It was the perfect time to be there - during the week after the Memorial Day holiday weekend, there were very few guests. The lodge tends to get booked solid during peak summer periods and during toboggan season, so make your reservations far in advance during these times. There are 137 guest rooms in the lodge. We ate in the quaint lodge dining room, and had an excellent meal for a reasonable price. I had some barbecued ribs, and the portion was big enough for me to box up for a couple of more meals. My partner had the soup and salad bar, and he said it was excellent - a good revue, because his standards are high.

We also enjoyed the indoor swimming pool, hot tub and sauna. Chlorine smell, especially around the hot tub, was pretty strong, but overall we enjoyed these spaces and I had a nice swim. There are some fun recreation rooms in the lodge with games and equipment for kids. I also saw a neat craft room that wasn't open the hours we were there, but looked like fun. The outer porch decks on two levels with a lovely overlook of Lake James are really scenic and relaxing. I saw several people with their dogs walking around as well - even in the dining room!

The highlight of my trip was a ride at the saddle barn. Only open in the summer, I got to go on a lovely trail ride through the woods. I saw the historic spring cabin with fresh spring water (I was told it is tested weekly and is clean to drink). I saw dogwood trees, redbuds, wildflower plants and so much greenery. Birds were chirping, and I saw my horse scouting the woods (perhaps for deer). I had a nice conversation with my horseback guide. Being there during an off-peak time, it was very quiet, relaxing and secluded on the ride through the woods.

There's lots to offer at Pokagon and the Potowatami lodge. It's a perfect getaway from Fort Wayne. Just get on I-69 and head north. Let's hope there are always local, state and national parks to enjoy. I think they are all so special and beautiful - some of the sweetest things in life.

Baymont Inn & Suites was a Nice Stay Off the Beaten Path Near DuPont and I-69

I needed a break. A break from my job, and also a break from the mundane tasks of doing dishes, cleaning floors, and washing bedsheets. Spring is popping out prettily here, and I really enjoy looking at all the beautiful blossoms coming out everywhere. Magnolias, redbuds, tulips, vinca, etc., are here for our viewing pleasure.

But there's also a bit of craziness that has been going on. The transition from cold to warm earth causes so many changes. Pollen erupts from plants, river water warms up, bugs hatch out. We are biological beings and we feel the tug of earth's forces. Sometimes there are some rough patches along the way, just as there are cracks in the roads and new potholes.

I chopped out old landscaping. I uncovered, then handled baby bunnies while doing so, and put them back in the nest. I shoveled mulch. And then, I just wanted a break, from worrying, caregiving, solving problems and doing chores.

So, I did this thing I do every few years - I booked a hotel room just for myself, to have some quiet "me" time. For me, the site has to have a pool so I can swim a little - it loosens up my sore hip that occurs when I stand at work too much. Bike riding and floor stretching are good for me, but somehow nothing helps like doing strokes in a pool.

So, I looked at prices online for nearby hotels, and chose the Baymont Inn & Suites at 2881 Dupont Road. By looking at websites, I found a price below the posted rate and called the local number for the hotel. Some of these prices really don't work or they require more than a one-night stay, or joining a plan, or meeting some other special conditions. The staff person was kind and helped me find a matching rate I could live with. I also asked for a AARP member discount, and there are many point systems, AAA deals, and other promotions available if you work at it. The site not having a lot of bookings for a Sunday night (the hotel was pretty empty) helped too.

One side of the hotel, the east side, is pretty close to Interstate 69, so I was afraid it might be noisy. But, luckily I was booked on the west side of the hotel, and it was surprisingly quiet. My room looked out onto what I believe is an office park, and there were no office workers there Sunday night. The room was small, clean, and tasteful. The shower was easily ergonomically accessible and the small fridge was cold. The in-room coffee maker worked. The bed was firm yet very comfortable. I was happy.

The person with whom I made the reservation told me the pool had recently been redone, and I was not disappointed. Windows let in natural light, and although small, the pool had lovely blue tile and seemed very clean and clear. I liked it. The water was a little cool but not bad - swimmers who are really trying to get a workout will tell you they don't want lukewarm water. I was by myself, which was fortunate - after hearing lawnmowers running all weekend and kids screaming in the neighborhood, I wouldn't have liked a ton of splashing and noise in the pool.

And then - it was back to my room for a little HBO and Game of Thrones. I like seeing the repeats of previous weeks' episodes before the new show - I always seemed to have missed something. This is really "wind down" time for me. I don't know all the details of all the stories, but after a few years, the main characters are like soap opera friends of mine - Jamie, John Snow, Cersei, Brienne, Arya, Stansa, Daenerys and Tyrion could almost all be drinking buddies of mine.

I enjoyed the GOT episode - I'm tempted to say something more specific but I've been warned by friends so no spoilers here. The hotel was quiet through the night. Breakfast was pretty standard yet perfectly suitable - the usual - cereals, sweets, breads, yogurts, eggs, sausage, a waffle maker, juices - all perfectly fine. I liked the paper flowers and decorations in the dining room, and realized it had just been Cinco de Mayo, so maybe that's why.

What I didn't like - the parking lot and bushes outside were pretty dirty. Trash scattered around, also it looked like people had dumped their car ashtrays with cigarette butts on the ground. No thank you. Perhaps the lot gets a little dirtier because of its proximity to the highway. But the staff were nice, and helpful, the pool clean and relaxing, the bed comfortable, the room quiet, and the brief stay did me a lot of good. It's a 'thumbs up' from me.

Wild Turkeys Simply Thrill Me

I get so excited when I see a flock of wild turkeys. Near Fort Wayne, in rural areas, it's not uncommon to see them in fields or crossing roads. This time of year --the spring, they seem very distracted, as big toms display for the females. Feathers and tails are all puffed out, bald blue heads, red wattles (under the chin) and snoods (over the head) are highly visible. Passing cars seem to barely excite the birds' attention.

During the times of Native Americans, before the push of "white" settlers, Eastern wild turkeys were spread across much of what is now the Midwest United States. They commonly lived in forests, and lost habitat when trees were cleared. Settlers hunted them voraciously, and wild turkeys basically disappeared from areas except for the Ozarks, the Appalachias, and swampland in the South.

From 1956 to 1979, over 200 turkeys were trapped in other places and released mostly in southern Indiana forests, in as many as 17 locations. By 1979, officials thought there were enough turkeys to allow hunting in 19 counties, and 48 birds were harvested in a 12-day season.

In the 1980's, over 1700 turkeys were released in Indiana at 112 sites. Up until present day, over 2700 turkeys have been released in 185 sites and the gobblers reside in 89 of Indiana's 92 counties. The population supports an enthusiastic hunting base, although the smart and wary turkeys sometimes prove to be a hard bird to take out. If they take off in flight, turkeys can fly as far as a mile and roost in trees. It's believed there may now be as many as 120,00 wild turkeys in Indiana.

Turkeys eat insects, berries, green leaves, acorns, seeds, and grain. They also swallow gritty material to help grind their food. In late winter, turkey flocks divide into different groups- hens in one group, young toms in another group and old gobblers in another. Adult males only grow the bristled black beard that hangs from the front center of their breasts. The bearded ones select a territory for their harems and defend it from any competitors. In the mornings, the old toms vocalize, calling to and courting as many hens as they can lure away from their neighbors' groups. These courting dances go on from roughly February to May. Male turkeys not only have talons, but also sharp spurs on the backs of their legs near the feet, which they can use in bloody fights against their rivals.

Hens create haphazard, yet well covered nests on the ground, and lay seven to 20 eggs, averaging usually around a dozen. Pinkish-brown chicks hatch to live and feed on the ground, and aren't able to fly until they're about a month old. Family groups eventually congregate into larger flocks that all feed, rest and roost together. Turkeys can run as fast as 25 mph and fly at speeds of nearly 55 mph. Who knew? I'm even more impressed.

I'm a little amazed at the numbers of wild turkeys that are harvested. The IN DNR reported as many as 12,000 have been bagged in a single year. It's incredible considering the birds' keen eyesight and hearing. A shooter has to remain virtually motionless. Numbers collected in Michigan are even higher - as many as 30,000 a year. The record was 42,000 in 2008, according to the Michigan DNR. That's a lot of turkey dinner. But only about one in five hunters actually bring in a turkey - it's that challenging.

It's debated as to whether Benjamin Franklin actually ever proposed to the Continental Congress that the wild turkey be named as the symbolic avian of our country. But Ben continues to seem wise over time - turkeys have come back and flourished, while bald eagles have sadly struggled with habitat loss and human population. Some folk even resent eagles' tendency to scavenge garbage dumps and drop unwanted waste from these in neighborhoods. But both the eagle and the turkey have their place, and just maybe old Ben was really on to something. I wish I had a turkey for a friend. I'm infatuated.

Ben is Back has Lessons for All of Us

Life can be sweetly peaceful in Indiana. Or in an instant, it can become very turbulent. Things can change quickly. We are so complicated, so flawed as human beings. We can be both so good and so bad, all at once.

I like to see the current movies, and I go to the local cinemas to see those I'm really interested in, or those I think would best be seen on a big screen. With that in mind, I saw Bohemian Rhapsody, A Star is Born, Mary Queen of Scots, Vice, and Black KKlansman at the theater. It's been years since I've been to the movies that often, but I think for me this was a particularly good string of films.

Others I will watch by streaming or downloading on my device, or pick up at a Redbox. A few that come to mind are The Favourite, The Wife, and Green Book. One movie had not been on my radar screen - Ben is Back. After a year of good movies, this one seemed to be hiding in the shadows. I got around to choosing it, and I was so glad I did.

I didn't know beforehand what the movie was about, and it's probably good I had no expectations. The story was written and the movie was directed by Peter Hedges, who did a good job combining suspenseful action storytelling with thorough, slow character development. One doesn't always see those two things together in the same movie. In a strange twist, the writer/director's own son is cast as the lead in the movie, reportedly at the insistence of star Julia Roberts (good call fighting for him, woman). Lucas Hedges is a brilliant actor, and I'll never forget him breaking out as the son who lost his father in Manchester by the Sea.

This story is a tale of narcotics addiction, recovery, and relapse. It's about the vicious cycle of the hold chemicals place on our brains. Many of us quickly become powerless to the substances. Our minds, our bodies crave them and the struggle becomes an all out fight for death and life with families destroyed, property stolen, bodies withered and well-being shattered. It is a tale told in every city, every small town, every barrio and every hamlet across the United States today, as we all know.

The writer did a good job with the dialogue in this film. The old 12-step recovery program, even if flawed, is one of the tried-and-true systems still working after all these years (it was started by a doctor and a businessman in Akron, OH in 1935). Lay people get to see it work on the television comedy show Mom and reality shows such as Intervention. In Ben is Back, the Serenity Prayer is used at a recovery meeting, as is the phrase "it works if you work it," meaning in part, just keep coming back.

The movie keeps one's attention - the lies told by addicts, to themselves and to others. When is Ben telling the truth and when is he not? And the enabling and lying of one's loved ones - the bargaining, the begging, excuses, rationalization. It plays out so well in this story. Julia gives a stellar performance here - perhaps her best work since Erin Brocovitch. I guess I find a little fault here in that even with her first-rate performance in this tale, I find I never really forget I'm looking at the familiar and famous JR - she doesn't totally disappear into the character. Maybe that's just my flaw, my bad.

Peter Hedges brings a reality and a special humor to this story that does seem to be a reflection of real life. For example, even as a fellow addict is trying to beat the crap out of Ben, he still takes a moment to look at Ben's mom and defer nicely: "I'm sorry, Mrs. B." She looks at him and says, "Spencer?" He says, "I go by Spider now." She says, "You look terrible!", not hiding her disgust.

The blended family is so real - the mom wonders if the breakup of her first marriage caused her son to spiral into addiction. She flagellates herself - what was it that she did wrong? But the son bluntly says it wasn't about that, he didn't need a dad - or at least, not that dad. The second husband has paid for multiple rehab sessions and had taken out a second mortgage on the house to pay for the last one. There is a mention of white and wealthy privilege - poor folks die more because rehab and health care is so expensive. There is discussion about the pharmaceutical industry and doctors, and all the political and social issues that play into the current crisis.

But somehow, nothing is as powerful as a great story, and a great storyline, well told. I haven't even mentioned Ponce the dog yet - also an important character. I won't spoil the story for you - you just need to see it for yourself. Peace be with you. Take it a day at a time.

Indy's USS Indianapolis Memorial Reminds Citizens of the Heroic Sacrifices of our Service Men and Women

Along the gentle waterway in the White River State Park, downtown Indianapolis, are walkways, sights and places to play. Modestly set along the path is an unobtrusive monument that could easily be overlooked if a person wasn't paying attention. Located on the east bank of the central canal, north end of the beautiful three-mile long Canal Walk, this ship-shaped memorial was designed by Joseph Fischer and installed in 1995.

Gray and black granite provide the palette for an etched account of the ship's story, and the names of its 1200 sailors are listed on its opposite side. After this giant navy cruiser was sunk in 1945 during WWII, only 317 crew members survived. I haven't shown it in my photographs above - rather, I've chosen to highlight the views around it - the very modern playground and a view down the canal.

This heavy cruiser was launched in 1931, served as the flagship of the scouting force, and often served as President Roosevelt's personal ship in WWII. She distinguished herself in many battles, including Aleutian Islands, Gilbert Islands, Marshall Islands, the capture of Guam and Saipan, the capture of Tinian Island, and the capture of Iwo Jima in 1945.

At Okinawa, a suicide Kamakaze plane stuck the ship and caused 38 U.S. casualties. But she is best known for being chosen to stealthily transport the world's first atomic bomb to Tinian in 1945. Afterwards, while motoring from Guam to Leyte, she was struck by two torpedoes launched by a Japanese submarine.

Many books and movies have been written about this dramatic, tragic story. The ship went down in minutes, as she had sailed unprotected without escort and was thus very vulnerable to the sub's attack. Many men were killed immediately by the torpedo strikes and their resulting explosions and fires. It is thought about 900 men went into the water alive, along with a few life boats and PFD's (vests) worn by the men.

The story gets more gruesome and tragic to tell. The waters were shark-infested, and blood in the water probably made their vicious attacks more imminent. Shark strikes went on for five days, until the first rescues finally happened. Even without the horror of the sharks, a majority of the men probably would have died, of thirst, dehydration, starvation, injury and exposure. It was literally hell on earth, at sea.

Heroic rescues began to occur after a bomber crew on routine anti-sub patrol accidentally spotted men in the water. A seaplane was dispatched to assist and a destroyer, under its own authority, diverted its mission at the time to go rescue men in the water. Between first the seaplane, which ditched itself in the water to help, and then the destroyer ship that came, and risked its own safety by shining its searchlights in the sky to beacon other rescue vessels, 317 lives were saved.

I've just touched the surface of this very dramatic story. I can't give it the justice due here. The simple memorial on the Indy canal bank sits peacefully, waiting to be found by city visitors. I don't seek out war memorials as such and their designs vary greatly around the United States. Yet this one makes me proud to be a citizen of the U.S., and a resident of Indiana. Fort Wayne is a great town, and Indianapolis is a terrific choice for a road trip destination from here. I'm no war history buff and I find these stories difficult to think about. Yet, lest we fail to remember -

Bless you, men of the Indianapolis. I'm glad your ship was named for my capitol city. Thank you, families of those men. You as well have made unbelievable sacrifices. I'm so humbled by your toil, and in a small way, proud to tell a small bit of your harrowing tale as well.